The Dark Academy on Korriban

With the message sent Kristal prepared herself for the arrival of Shaisha. It had taken her till now to put together the resolve to ask the question, till now to temper herself as she wished to be. The thought of it brought back the memory of the vision. Tonight she would know one thing and not know a thousand others.

Waiting in her room Kristal's back was turned toward the entrance. Looking to the wall as she steeled herself for the question she would have to ask.

Shaisha wouldn't turn down a message from Kris, even if she had a bad feeling about this. As she walked past the other dormitories on her way to see the Serasai scion, she wondered if her father ever had felt, or still did feel, something similar when he met relatives and descendants of those he had dispatched in the Emperor's name. That feeling of a stone sinking into your stomach.

He probably had at some point, at least, she told herself, but when he had done this for probably three-hundred years, he must've grown numb to the sensation.

It was something she had a feeling she had to grow numb to as well, if she were to live up to her father's expectations of her.

As Kris had sent a message to meet her in her room, Shaisha saw no point to knock, as she knew her friend valued efficiency. Friend... what sort of friend am I then?

"Kris?" she asked, stepping inside the room.

Slowly Kristal let out a breath as she heard the door open. If she hadn't had her arms linked behind her back her hand might have been shaking with the things she felt in this moment. It was incredibly difficult to keep together, but she would persevere.

"I need to know," she said vaguely, setting herself up. Not turning around yet, it made it easier on her to start without looking at her, but the question had to be direct. She needed to see.

Turning about Kristal looked straight to Shaisha, needing it to be honest. Looking to the other woman's eyes. That was clear enough in the gravity that her tone held as she asked,

"I need you know who your father is."

Fast, like removing adhesive from the skin.

It hadn't exactly been the question she had expected, but when she heard it... she knew it had been unavoidable. When Kristal had asked before, Shaisha had always deflected. She never liked talking about her father to Kristal and Sylvain, even if Sylvain knew. On reflection, she wondered if it was because of some amount of jealousy towards those two who had their parents.

"Judging by how you're looking at me, I think you might already know the answer," she started calmly. It seemed she would do her usual talk around the issue, the usual Shaisha-style. But there was no smile, no predatory smirk.

Her posture simulated Kristal's; the straight-back, the hands folded together before her in military-style.

"I respect you too much to lie to you, Kristal," she continued. "Lord Scourge, the Emperor's Wrath, is my father."

The words she had held from Kristal for so long left her mouth. It had been easier than she had expected, and to her surprise, she felt she wanted to tell more, but not knowing how Kristal would react to the confirmation of her suspicions, she waited.

Pale skin, one of the signs of being shot and bleeding out. If Shaisha had not know better she might have thought that was the cause. It was like she had been but there was no blaster involved. Even then Kristal did not waver. It had hit her like a truck, she knew but part of her still had hoped. Now there was no doubt.

Shaisha would get her chance, because Kristal asked another question despite the emotions and thoughts that ravaged her mind.

"You spoke to your father then? Yesterday, as you said you would the night before it."

There was no purpose to the question. Shaisha probably knew it, and Kristal most certainly did. Already possessing that particular answer. However the question had clearly come regardless. Perhaps it was a hook, or simply an open space for Shaisha to share anything else she might wish to attempt to share. To explain what she had done.

"I did," she confirmed, but she took no pleasure in it, seeing how hard it was for Kristal. "I explained to him the situation and intel, both what I had found and what we heard in Syl's room that night. He made the final decision."

"He did not, you did the moment you told him. Whatever you said, he believed you... he trusted your words so fully he executed my father with no reason other than your word alone." Kristal spoke with words that held strength, conviction, they were honest. Of course, how could she have known?

Shaisha's eyes narrowed. She didn't think Kristal was lying, but... she didn't think herself as someone who swayed the opinion of the Emperor's Wrath.

"How do you know that? You don't know him. Most of the time, I'm not sure if I do either, but..." she sighed silently, taking a moment to keep her composure, "it's a complicated thing. Him and me."

"The Emperor's Wrath trusts you more than you know, he said so himself after he killed my father. I do not delude myself believing I can understand the man, I merely know what I saw."

Anger was involved, it came up anytime Kristal thought of how her father was killed. At least now it did. Now when she thought of it she saw his face the moment before he was gone. Felt the stab of betrayal she felt when Shaisha confirmed her identity. It focused her and aided in maintaining that cool front she put forward.

Knowing what she said, Kristal did not let Shaisha remain confused for long. Letting Shaisha put together the pieces on what Kristal had done alone. "I saw a vision, I believe as you may have."

"I saw my fathers death."

"... I am sorry you had to see that," it was heartfelt, sounding as if it might have been something she could relate to. To hear that her father trusted her judgement so, it would normally have filled that empty space she often felt in regards to her family. But now, it was merely swallowed by the void there.

"Korriban has given me visions. Some I do not fully comprehend yet. At least yours gave you an answer you wanted."

She stood calmly, her usual fire dimmed. A part of her wanted to ask of what Kristal had seen in her vision, but she couldn't bring herself to put it into words, seeing how it pained her so.

"It was not an answer I wanted," she said with that coldness she possessed. Though there was no fire behind it. "One that I needed, perhaps."

This was Shaisha, her friend, one she wanted to hate so badly right now but she couldn't. There was anger, sure, but she couldn't hate. Not when it felt like her father was standing in the room with them. Chin up Champ. Brush off the dirt, dry your tears, and push on.

Kristal fell out of her stance, her shoulders slumped and she moved over to the chair by her desk. Letting herself fall into it she let her head fall back against the chair. Closing her eyes as she asked, "Did you, in that moment, want the death of my father?"

She took a deep breath. She was the one who had suggested it, but if she had wanted it... if the way she felt now was any indication, she hadn't wanted to see Kristal's father dead; only the removal of a piece on Baras' side of the board.

And as she had learned lately herself, sometimes one was a piece without knowing it.

She shook her head.

"I was often jealous of you and Sylvain, growing up with you two, but... not like that."

Eyes open, she looked to Shaisha. Then asked the question she had perhaps used the wrong words for moments prior, but now knew the proper ones.

"Before, when, you were speaking with your father. Did you know what he would do? Was that your intent?"

"My intent was to strike at Baras," she said with a soft voice. "He wouldn't do it, as it would tip the scales of power and further escalate the feuds on the Dark Council. When I spoke of Moff Serasai as a piece in Baras' play, whether willing or unknowing, I did not know, or believe at the time, that he would listen to me."

She let her hands unfold and relaxed her posture as well.

"As I said, we've not been on the best of terms since I came to live with the Torsins. That he would put faith in my words so, as you said, is a surprise to me. Syl knew who my father was, but I never spoke much about my father or my past life to him. I feel at this point, I might as well share it with you, if you would want to hear it, though I fully understand if you don't."

For a long time Kristal debated with herself, unsure if she could manage to listen to Shaisha. There was that phantasmal urging she received. It was a play of her mind, her better self perhaps, but it was hard on her. Too hard almost. Part of her wanted to tell Shaisha to leave, to just leave and give Kristal some time but Shaisha had something she wished to share and Kristal decided to not kick her out while there was still something left unsaid.

"I will hear it," she said, tone tired but cold and strong.

Shaisha's nod conveyed her appriciation for being given the chance.

"When I was born, my father was not yet the Emperor's Wrath. Yes, I know he has been the Wrath for quite some time now. He was different then; what I remember was a man who was strong, often stern, but passionate. My mother spoke well of him, and I think I could understand why they were drawn to eachother, but also why they didn't stay together. She continued her own career, and he his, walking separate paths."

"... And then, one day, my mother did not come home. Instead, servants of the Emperor came, and took me from my home. I was told my mother was dead, died in service of the Emperor as part of his Imperial Guard. At that point... my memories are a bit of a haze, but I know I was put in stasis for a long time. When I was awakened again, the only family I still had, was my father, who was now the Emperor's Wrath. Very little like I remembered him."

"There was no comfort to be found in my position, and it didn't take long before I was sent to live with someone that could take care of me, something he could not, or would not do. Ever since then, I've hardly spoken with him. I think I could count on one hand how often it has been in those ten years."

She sighed. "That is why I didn't believe he would listen to what I had gathered about Baras' moves. These years, he has never given me any indication that I was worth his time. I contacted him because I wanted to hear his advice on the situation... I didn't expect him to listen to me at all."

"I know it is no excuse, but... I have given you as much of the picture as I can."

There was no movement from Kristal as Shaisha told her story. Listening intently, looking for the answers he might give her. How it might change things. It gave her none of that. However, it did give her something else. There was a need to do something for her friend that came up amidst all the anger and hate.

"Shaisha," she said, standing. Leaving silence as she walked over to the apparently much older woman than she had actually aged. Pulling her close the young Imperial brought her into a hug that almost seemed to be fueled by a bit of that anger, or Kristal was merely strong.

It lasted for a moment or two, conveying those feelings she felt for her friend. How it must feel to have him as a father. Kristal was able to at least try and understand, but that didn't solve everything. Placing her hands on Shaisha's shoulders Kristal stepped back and looked to her friend. Meeting her eyes to show her truest intent.

"For sharing your story you have my thanks, but.." she paused, changing the wording she wished to use. "You are one of my only and dearest friends, I love you and will forgive you. Some day, but right now I cannot muster the strength. Which is why I need you to leave."

With that she let her hands slip from her shoulders.

Shaisha tensed as Kristal approached, and for a split second, she wondered the possibility on drawing the lightsaber on the Serasai. The two had sparred on and off through the years, but she wasn't sure who would be the victor if life or death was suddenly on the line between them.

Then, when Kristal wrapped her arms around her, she felt some of her resolve fading. No... she wouldn't cry. Even when she returned the gesture of the embrace. Then their eyes met as Kristal spoke.

"I thank you for your trust, and kindness, Kristal. I don't know if I would have given mine so freely, were our positions reversed." Truly, Kristal was the most noble of the three of them, Shaisha thought.

There was nothing more that could be said between them. She needed to give Kristal that space, and time most of all. Shaisha doubted that their friendship could ever truly recover to what it had been.

Her hands slipped from Kristal as well. "Be safe."

With those parting words, Shaisha left Kristal's room. Her feelings weighed heavy on her, and yet at the same time, she felt a small burden being lifted from her shoulders. Again she was reminded of Kristal's words, that her father had trusted her judgement so fully, he had followed through because of her, and not because of his own insight.

She would have many things to think about.

/exit