Fuckin' Up the Republic - Episode IZeno's face is in the center of the display screen, smile on his face.
"Alright guys... this is, uhm... episode one of Fuckin' Up the Repbublic. I'm Lord Zeno Deathwright... you might recognize me from the, uh... the orientation exam of the latest graduates from the academy on Korriban... or the Massassi battle on Yavin IV. So I'm gonna be keeping a record of my, uh... adventures and exploits. Aaaand, we're gonna get to look back on good times killing Republican assholes together."
He reaches out and grabs the camera, moving it around and showing that he's in the cockpit of a starfighter with a small squadron around him and a blue-green planet in close proximity, at which point
some music starts playing low so as to not drown out his voice. "I got a couple of my Deathwright brothers and sisters with me... for this one. We're Death's Shadow Squadron... currently prepping for an assault as a favor to my family at a classified location. Intel says there's a Jedi master and a couple of his cronies down there. Gonna show them what a Sith Lord can do."
The camera turns back around to his own face with a wider smile. "So... I guess let's get started. I don't know about you guys, but I'm pretty jacked right now."
The camera turns around and is lowered on to his head, apparently mounted on his helmet. "Blood Rage command... this is DSS-1 requesting permission for operation start."
A voice comes on over the comms. "DSS-1, this is Blood Rage command. Operation is green lit. You are good to go."
Zeno replies. "Copy that Blood Rage command. See you on the other side. DSS-1 out." The comms audibly click over to another channel. "All members of DSS, this is DSS-1. Everybody on me, time to light'em up."
At this point the squadron starts it's decent into the planetary atmosphere in a loose formation, eventually moving into a dive maneuver together. As Zeno looks around at his comrades the starfighters can be seen shaking during re-entry. "This... this is gonna be awesome."
As the first song fades and some sort of small installation starts coming into view on the ground, Zeno gives his order while the
next song starts up, "Bath'em in fire Deathwrights." Some sort of surface defenses start firing up at the squadron, immediately before a volley of munitions are let loose from the starfighters. "Whooooo!" Zeno's fighter begins dodging among the incoming ground defenses and blaster cannon fire starts pouring from DSS, following the heavier munitions in. One explodes mid air, struck down by the ground defenses but the rest light the compound up with a massive incendiary explosion and the ground based fire is reduced to a tenth of it's original power.
"DSS-2 and 3, on me. We're going in on foot. Remainder, take out what defenses you can and provide close air support when I call for it." The entire scene unfolds vividly on the display, probably edited to improve the sharpness and stability of the video.
Zeno's ship comes in fast before making a sudden turn to change direction and use the power of the engine to buffer the landing. The audio channel clicks, presumably to only be heard by the recorder. "That was a rush! Alright. We heard there's potentially a knight and couple padawan dipshits here. We're about to let them know that the galaxy doesn't need their shit and the empire is going to put them in their place." The canopy opens quickly as the starfighter can be heard landing heavily on the ground. The camera spins around and the three ship can be seen being left behind as Zeno leaps from the cockpit in a flip and lands amidst a group of dead republicans that are all armed and a fiery hell of burning buildings. Another click.
"DSS-2 and 3. You good?" he asks.
Two voices, one male and one female, clash over the comms. "Confirmed DSS-1."
"Time to rock and roll," there is obvious excitement in his voice and the previous song ends as a
new one starts. One more click. "This one's for my comrades back home... you know who you are, all of you."
He starts moving through the compound until he reaches the largest building. His two lightsabers can be seen lighting up as he moves. The structure was apparently hardened because there are 2 guards standing outside the front of the building waiting for their arrival. Blaster fire errupts, from both sides as and occasionally one of the republic shots can be seen flying off in a different direction as Zeno bats it away. One of the men goes down from blaster fire, the other dies by lightsaber a second later... vividly in the face of the camera. "Smile... you're famous," Zeno says with a jovial tone. The armored guard slumps to the ground and Zeno begins opening the hardened door with his saber. "This could take a minute." The video jumps forward to the door falling down.
Inside two lightsabers light up amid flashing, failing lights. "Hey there, assholes. I was told three... where's the other."
The two padawans, one a human and the other a cathar, both with a single braid, slowly and cautiously approach, calm and serene, not saying a word as Zeno steps into the room. The sound of continued blaster cannon fire and starfighters as well as music, continues in the background.
"No? Alright, guess I'll find them when I'm done with you two. Stand back DSS-2 and 3. They're mine," he says looking back at his squad mates who are standing ready, back to back, watching both sides of the doorway.
As he turns back around, the bright green of a saber is right in his face, but batted away easily by Zeno. "Oh, you're going to need to do better than that... but you're not going to get the chance really. Been nice knowing you." Which seems to be the cue for the
next song.
A two on one lightsaber battle ensues with Zeno proving far more agile and skilled than either warrior, but when they work together against him they push him back a few times. Eventually, however the human makes a mistake that Zeno capitalizes on and removes her head with a single cut. He turns to the cathar and chuckles darkly. "You're corruption will be removed from the galaxy. Time to meet your end." Alone and against a far more skilled opponent, the cathar puts up a valiant effort but has a leg removed by a vicious cut.
"Where's the other? I'm guessing they're the knight," Zeno asks. The cathar says nothing, just staring up at the sith for a few seconds. "Alright then... time to cleanse the galaxy of your threat." A lightsaber pierces through the cathar's chest and Zeno turns and leaves.
"Alright... not sure where the other guy is... maybe in one of the other buildings..." As his squadmates clear the way for him to exit he sees one of the remaining ground defenses being manned by what's likely the last jedi. There's a click. "DSS, we're clear of that defense laser. Send it to hell, all you got." He ducks back into the bunker and drags his comrades with him. The final click. "Listen... listen for it..." Multiple explosions can be heard from outside and the entire building they're in shakes violently. The helmet comes off and turns to face Zeno, the blinking lights of the building flashing off his smiling face. "And there it is... That's the sound of the end of episode one of Fuckin' Up the Republic. Join me next time and we'll see what kind of trouble we can cause those traiterous pricks Zeno out." With that the video feed cuts and the song finishes giving credit to the members of DSS, the editor, the Empire and finally the Emperor over the Imperial emblem.