The Dark Academy on Korriban

That was enough of public farewells for both of them. Counting in their minds to three on top of #66, Moyr and Sylvain quietly entered her room. She pulled him in for a kiss a second after she had locked the door.

Sylvain smiled as he followed her into her room and returned her kiss with yet another smile.

"Time for the private after party huh?" He asked as his smile shifted to a more coy expression than it was before.

"You think?"

She said pushing herself off him to still quite close a distance, just enough to make a graceful full turn. In her new black gown, gorgeous chiffon-and-lace backless over her crimson skin, she was an aesthetic phenomenon of her own category.

"So, a small drink and a polite conversation?"

She asked from over her shoulder, batting lashes.

"Sounds like a good way to start." He said with a smile as he admired her wonderfully Sith-like beauty.

"You look stunning in that dress."

"And you remain quite eloquent and charming for someone who is stunned."

She put a finger across his lips and pulled it down slowly to press them slightly ajar before releasing them entirely and so letting them pop back.

He smiles, "Somethings inspire awe to the point of speechlessness, and some inspire to the point where inspiration runs free."

He reached up and caressed her cheek, "If I am eloquent it is merely because your beauty gives me such inspiration."

"My observation is that you are independently eloquent, Syl. My beauty might just be a ready subject."

She let his hand cradle her cheek, tilting her head into it and half-closing her eyes.

"Are there things that make you speechless?"

He smiled, "Very few... but evenings with you have often brought out that emotion in me. And you? What captivates you?"

"You've seen me captivated if you think about it just a little."

She turned her face to kiss the lifeline on his palm.

"Would it not be exciting for you to look out for more moments of my speechlessness, not knowing what they are and when they could come? There is a distinct charm to sharing first times of various kinds together. Because when one focuses on likelessnesses, on categories, on precedences it turns out that the world is full of patterns and repetitions, not of novelties and unique things... and people. In our heads those people may be doomed to play roles written for someone else."

She sighed.

"But you can always tell me it's better to be informed than to be amazed."

He smiled and held her closely, "That is why you are so good for me in so many ways. It takes a lot to jar me from my practicalities and emphasis on patterns. Your wild desire for more and better things is something that I find quite amazing. It is something that I need, and hope that you don't tire of my fettering personality that anchors us to reality. It's nice to have the best of both worlds."

"The best of both worlds... it's true, it's nice. But is it just nice, Syl? Nice is not the first word that comes to my mind when I think of someone who might be my anchor."

She lay her head on his chest.

"I know I am good for you in many ways. Though probably not in all, for no-one is... I know so little of what happens in your practical mind. Of your balance sheets of haves and have nots."

"What insights would you wish for me to share? It can be rather tedious in here sometimes." He points to his head.

"I'd hate to bore you with my inane babbling."

"It sounds like you're discouraging me. As if letting me in was causing you discomfort."

She did not say anything more about it. The question was asked several times, at least two in this very conversation. He simply didn't want to give her an answer.

"I am travelling to Kaas City from Korriban but I don't know how long I'll be able to stay there."

He smiled, "There is nothing I would discourage less. I am comfortable around you, and wish to make you as comfortable as you would can."

Then he asked, "We'll have to make that time count then won't we?"

He winked and kissed her gently, "Do you know where you travel after that?"

"I must meet my master, Lord Yulo. Before boarding for the return trip from Yavin I was informed that he was interested in taking an apprentice. It seems xenos don't get Darths as masters that often after all. Funny thing I haven't heard about him before. You? I just hope he's nothing like Zash."

She returned the gentle kiss.

"I bet I'll be sent somewhere, but hopefully I'll be returning to where I'll be able to find you. But only if you want that, Syl. I still haven't figured out how much staying power I have in here."

Moyr lay her hand over his heart in a similar way she had back in a tent on Yavin.

"Of course I want that Moyr... the more time we spend together the more staying power you get." He smiled, "That's not just nice... that's wonderful. I trust you feel the same?"

"You are in my room and we're kissing, Syllie. Extrapolate."

She grinned before crossing wrists behind his neck and connecting with him for a wet, passionate rendezvous of their lips and tongues.

He smiled and leaned in to anxiously return her passion.

"Then make sure you make it back to me often." He said as they broke their lip-locking.

"As long as you will be there for me."

She sighed, pulling away slightly. Her voice turned weary.

"Because from what I can tell your turbulent relationships with loving sisters, or sisterly lovers, are not as over as you professed in the tent on Yavin. I am not angry at you, but I do feel weary seeing you spreading yourself thin when you know beyond any doubt this is not how it is supposed to be between you and I."

She kissed him gently.

"There is only so far you can go lying to me, to them, to yourself. I will repeat myself just this once, Syl. I want you to be mine, and I want to be yours. It's been my wager you have the strength to make it so. This is the only way you can keep me. If you squander this I will close my heart, cut my losses and that will be the end of it. Maybe they have not taught you what an end means, but with me there are no back and forths. I can only love you once."

Sylvain nodded as she spoke and took several deep breaths, thinking about what she had said, "You've been nothing but good to me... And I cannot deny my heart has been in different places at different times. But it is like you said, Shaisha and Kristal are my sisters. I know your ties with your family are nothing that brought you support as a child; quite the opposite in fact. But for me they do offer a kind of support that helps drive me to be better. There is a considerable amount of personal experience and trust to fall back on even when things get rough."

He smiled weakly, "Unfortunately we do not yet share that same reservoir, and if I was forced to make a decision this moment and right now, I would have to prioritize that register of experience that I can look back on with confidence... But that does not mean that things cannot continue to change for the better for us. The more time we spend together, the more willing I am to abandon much of what I rely on and head into uncharted space with you... I am sorry for the nature of the gradual build, but I am a methodical and slow thinker at times... The mere fact that I would even consider a relationship that could terminate my relationship with my sisters is indication of my feelings toward you."

He reached out and gently held her hand, "I know this is the least romantic thing in the world to say perhaps, but I have been and will continue to be honest with you. I will be there for you as long as you allow me to."

She pulled her hand away.

"It is. It is intolerable for me what you suggest."

Looking into his eyes with defiant directness, she started singing.

"This is my least favorite life
The one where you fly and I don’t
A kiss holds a million deceits
And a lifetime goes up in smoke
This is my least favorite you
Who floats far above earth and stone
The nights that I twist on the rack
Is the time that I feel most at home

We're wandering in the shade
And the rustle of fallen leaves
A bird on the edge of a blade
Lost now forever, my love, in a sweet memory

The station pulls away from the train
The blue pulls away from the sky
The whisper of two broken wings
May be they’re yours, maybe they’re mine
This is my least favorite life
The one where I am out of my mind
The one where you are just out of reach
The one where I stay and you fly

I'm wandering in the shade
And the rustle of fallen leaves
A bird on the edge of the blade
Lost now forever, my love, in a sweet memory"

Her gaze was not tearful, but the golden orbs were glazed.

"Is this what you want your song to be, Sylvain Torsin? Do you know what's the worst of it? Your weak indecisiveness. Your petty guardedness. Your inability to make a decision and stick with it, to man up the consequences. You fooled me. I believed you to have decided. I would have never allowed you to do things you did to me if I knew I would one day hear this. Conditions. Excuses. Trying to talk me into understanding your inability to make hard choices... for the fuck's sake. I want force you to make a decision, Sylvain Torsin. I will make it. And I give you the freedom to hate me for it. Perhaps hate will fuel your strength the way love couldn't."

Her fists balled and she took a step away. Her lekku swirled like rattlesnakes.

"So you told a lie and scored a Twi'lek. Congratulations. A pity Twi'leks are so last season in the Imperial societe. Now get out, back to your doting sisters with benefits. Or wherever. Just out of my sight."

He watched her reaction and nodded his head signifying he was listening, "Very well Moyr. I can see how you would think that. Though 'scoring' a Twi'lek was never my intention. You call my actions indecisiveness, but I do not see them as such. Choosing to not interfere with the natural growth and development of things is a choice just like the opposite. Our relationship is still in its primary stages, what it could become if given the time and cultivation is not yet determined. I was resolved to see it continue to grow and develop, to provide it space beside the other forms of life that surround it. Without the leading hand of a cultivator that small sapling can easily be suffocated by the larger trees that stand beside it. But if nourished and protected, it can one day grow to be greater than whatever would get in its path. I chose to cultivate and nurture our relationship the best that I could, but to ask to tear down the other relationships that I have in exchange for what it might be... that is not a choice I will make. It's true what we have could have been great, better than anything else... but until that became apparent, and our relationship developed the legs that it would require to make it past anything... I cannot choose to destroy what I know to be a useful and productive relationship that I have with others."

He pauses briefly, "It is heartbreaking for me as well as you that our little sapling does not have the potential to carry on further, but I understand your reasons for choosing to 'cut your losses'. I do not hate you Moyr, though I understand why you are justified in hating me. That is who you are, and that is a person that I cared for deeply... I do not wish to repay your affection and devotion with pain, but at this moment it is the only option before me that I can make... that is who I am. My affections for you have taught me much about myself and have helped me grow into a stronger man... I can only hope that I in some way have done the same for you. You were never a simple roll in the hay... of that I assure you."

With that he bows his head a bit in farewell and starts to head for the door unless stopped.

There was too much pain in engaging with what he was saying. It still could be broken down to a very simple message of his unwillingness to take risks and sacrifices even remotely similar to what she was willing to do for him. Even at a moment like this, he was just full of himself. All he could see in his speech was just another act. A performance for half-witted audience. Sapling, the nerve!

The extent to which she had been wrong about him flabbergasted her. She had been fooled by him because she was a fool. He had hedged since the beginning, playing her. She wanted him go before she would succumb to self-loathing. She wanted him to disappear, to be forgotten, to be erased. That cocksure monument of her naivete.

Though Moyr pondered cutting him down, he was not stopped in any way.

Replacing the mask on his head, a mechanical voice replied, "Goodbye Moyr..."

As the door opened and closed as he left the room.

/exit

She would not give him another word. Not a single part of herself. Not a shred of attention. Ever. When he left, she could calm down into uneasy determination. She tore the dress off herself, literally, and threw to the bin what was left. She couldn't stay naked, for it too reminded her of what she had allowed him to do with her body, how much it had cared to give him pleasure. She quickly wrapped herself in tapes and threw a jacket over her shoulders. Then, she turned Virginia, formerly Victoria, on and wanted to head out. She stopped by the door, afraid that he was out there, lurking, so she ultimately let Virginia go first. But fortunately he wasn't there anymore.

She rushed out toward the speeders, intent on heading to the desert. She could not tell how loud the sounds of her pain can get, so it was better to build a healthy distance from... from everything.

/scene